Each year, the marketing and promotions department works diligently to create elvis promotions and giveaways that will bring fans to the ballpark. In many cases, they are quite successful and these giveaways add to the fun and excitement of the ballpark experience.

But sometimes, these promotions become to mainstream and border on boring. This leaves fans wondering, "What would happen if they tried something a little off-the-wall?"

Having been to all the home games for the Arizona Diamondbacks, I hear this a lot.

Once in a while, the suggestions made are pretty strange and bizarre. This web page is dedicated to those imaginative fans who come up with their own ideas for promotions and giveaways.

Promotion Description
Area 51 Night

On games where Randy Johnson is pitching, a section of the outfield bleachers and part of the extreme upper deck will be taken over by alien beings. Of course the Diamondbacks will deny this area exists but arial pictures will be shown on the JumboTron of the strange happenings in these areas. During the game, one lucky fan will win a trip to Roswell, New Mexico.

BOB Night

All people named Bob will be admitted to the park for a reduced rate. For those who have a retractable roof (read bald with a bad toupee), they will be given a certificate good for re-sodding (read bottle of Rogaine).

Mental Health Night

All schizophrenics receive two seats for the price of one with proof of mental illness. Limit of 2 tickets per personality.

Redneck Night

For the first 5,000 fans who can show residency in a trailer park and that own at least 5 dogs, they will receive a coupon good for free dental work and an 8-track tape of Hee-Haw's Greatest Hits Volume 1.

Extended Elvis Night

Elvis Night will be expanded to include on-field personnel. All players must play their positions in leisure suits with tall collars. Fans will vote on which player looks most like young Elvis and which looks like the later Elvis.

Gilligan's Island Night

On nights when Armando Reynoso is pitching, those fans who stay for the entire 3-hour tour will be given radios made from coconut shells.

Lunatics Run the Show

As a follow-up to the successful Mental Health Night, there will be Lunatics Run the Show Night. Here the criminally insane will shadow members of the organization and do their jobs for a day. Fans will be asked to distinguish the sane from the insane.

NRA Night

Charlton Heston will be invited to shoot the ceremonial first pitch. During the 7th Inning Stretch there will be a gunfight in center field pitting gun-control lobbyists against lifetime NRA members.

Tofu Races

Catering to the vegetarian fans, the Circle K Hot Dog races will be replaced with Tofu races where blocks of soy cakes will slime around the base paths. This evening of festivities will be emceed by Carrot Top.